See Hearts, not Stories

klvadmin Fix My Life, Iyanla Vanzant, Oprah


I recently watched Iyanla Vanzant’sFix My Life,” where she spoke with pro football player Terrell Owens (TO) regarding his childhood dysfunction and how he is recreating it as an adult. In case you aren’t familiar with TO, he is a former NFL football superstar as well known for his off-the-field antics as much as his superior athleticism. It was easy to see how his football talents ‘created’ his seemingly inflated ego and antics and therefore I considered him cocky and frankly a jackass. I was seeing his story and not his heart. I was seeing his self protective armor in the form of arrogance rather than a broken heart that lashed out in self protection.

I often say people who hurt others are rooted in pain. They still have consequences to face, yet seeing them as wounded rather than bad is where deep healing can occur. See their hearts rather than their stories. I may not be the person to help them see their own hearts, but I can be the person to not perpetuate their stories by agreeing with it and negatively label it.

My three biggest take aways from watching this episode are:

Thanks to Fix My Football Star Life with Iyanla and TO my understanding for love and compassion has deepened to see hearts over stories. I may react to the story initially, but through awareness, I will look deeper than what it shown to me.

When negatively reacting to a person or an experience, I will become aware of my own insecurities that feeling has triggered as life is a magical mirror to reflect the love and sorrow that resides within.

Mostly, I am a firm believer that we experience life through the lens of love or fear. I am now reminded when I choose to negatively label someone; I’ve chosen the fear lens. Awareness always in all ways gives me the opportunity to choose love over fear, peace over conflict, health over illness, and abundance over lack.

How can YOU open your eyes to seeing more hearts than stories? I would love to see them below in comments.