Have you ever wanted something so badly and yet you turn away from it out of fear? Perhaps it’s a job that you want to do, but you’ve been told you aren’t good enough for it, you can’t make money at it, or some other excuse is holding you back. Perhaps it’s about wanting a romantic relationship and your fear says you are unworthy of it. Often, the things we want most in our lives, our fears holds us back from going for them.
If you’ve been following me for a while, then you know my passion and purpose is to let people know they matter in this world and help them heighten celebrations and lessen sorrows. I have been doing it for many years and each year – heck each DAY I grow and learn on ways to do it more heartfelt. I love coaching/mentoring and I’m very comfortable in that role. I love inspiring via social media, and it too is a role I am very comfortable with. I love working as an event manager and I’m also very comfortable in that role. I have also spoken in front of large and small audiences as that is a big dream of mine. However, that role is always met with a lot of fear wondering if people will truly see ME!
Most of the time I go full steam ahead on following my dreams. And trust me, that doesn’t mean they show up in a blink of an eye, but it does mean I continue moving forward toward them. Well that is until it comes to public speaking. They say people are more fearful of public speaking than dying – in my case that is true. And it’s an odd fear as I LOVE talking to people, seeing people and sharing with people. I’ve been told numerous times that I do a good job at it and yet I still have had a larger than the normal ‘butterflies’ fear of it. EVEN after I’m told it went well, so it’s been something I’ve truly wanted yet have allowed fear to put the brakes on to keep me in my comfort zone. Well, that is, until recently.
Because of my experience with free hugs, I knew that message was far too important and powerful not to share, so I joined Toastmasters. I began speaking on hugs and although the repetition helped, I was still fearful taking the stage. I was worried I would completely forget my speech even after practicing it for hours and hours. And since I believe what I focus on is what I create, I was even more afraid as I knew I was focusing on forgetting rather than shining!
When you start moving toward your dreams, your dreams start moving toward you! Often those dreams show up in unexpected ways, that’s why I often encourage you to keep your dreams general allowing the Universe multiple paths to get you there. For the past eight years I’ve worked with Mishka Productions who put on fabulous life altering events. Liz Dawn Donahue is not only the owner of the company she is the face and voice of it too. I’m usually behind the scenes doing mission critical work that I enjoy doing. That is, until this past event – Celebrate Your Life – Houston. Liz asked me to emcee the event!! Not in a million years could I have predicted that she would ask me that, nor would it be the place I had to get over myself and just do it. Now of course I didn’t tell her I was terrified, I just said YES! She knows me well and had faith that I would do a good job. Liz is dynamic on stage and I immediately went into comparison of our styles being different (yes – I coach others not to compare themselves!). I emceed an event with 8 spiritual thought leaders like Iyanla Vanzant, Marianne Williamson, Anita Moorjani, a Unity Minister who has been shining his light for over 30 years, and personally speaking to an audience of over 750 people!! After Friday mornings initial welcoming introduction, I relaxed into it and actually had a great time! I learned a lot and can see how I can even enhance my onstage presence.
I’m sharing this story with you not to say YAY Carol, but rather to say I was terrified and moved forward anyway. I share it to remind you that regardless of your fear, LOVE is so much bigger!
Moving forward, I invite you to allow your dreams to unfold by:
Generalizing your dreams. You want a romantic relationship, rather than focusing on the exact person you want it to be, focus on how you want to feel in that relationship. In your meaningful work, rather than the title or company, focus the impact you want to have and what type of people you want to work for or collaborate with. Rather than focusing on a particular dollar amount in the bank, focus on how you feel knowing that you have money in the bank – secure, safe, comfortable, etc.
Moving forward even if you don’t know the how’s and when’s. You don’t have to know how and when your dreams are going to unfold, you just need to hold the vision of how you want to feel in life.
Visualize it. It seems hard to visualize when I’m asking you to generalize your dreams, but you can put as much specifics in your dreams as you want, as long as – and it’s a BIG as long as… you aren’t attached exactly to it turning out that way. I have been seeing myself on stage in front of a big audience (mainly because I was scared of it) and how it came about wasn’t even in my thought process! When I visualize or affirm, I always add ‘this or something greater for the highest good of all involved.’
Feel that way now! You can get into the feeling space of being in love, loving your job, or whatever it is you want to create in your life right in this very moment. Play the part a little bit in your day. When you are driving to work, pretend you are driving to that dream job. When you open the door coming home say honey I’m home. Whatever it is you are moving toward, start right now.
Mostly, I want you to move forward because YOU deserve to live a life filled with amazing people and experiences. Believe in YOU!
Until next time, move toward love and fear will begin to take a backseat.
I am moving forward to deeper love, laughter and happiness than I have ever known before.
WORDS TO LIVE BY:
“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them – that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.”
~ Lao Tzu
“We keep moving forward, opening new doors, and doing new things, because we’re curious and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths.”
~ Walt Disney
“If everyone is moving forward together, then success takes care of itself.”
~ Henry Ford
SOUNDS OF THE SOUL